Feeling like a scaredy cat today...
Today is not a good day.
Today I had a major panic/anxiety attack. And really all for nothing. We were supposed to have a 9am showing. Getting the kids up, dressed and fed in time to leave is a major feat in itself. Then you throw in cleaning.... AAAARGH!
3 hours later I still have an adrenaline rush. I wish I didn't have this anxiety disorder. I feel like a cat with it's hairs standing on end. I probably look like one too.
After we got home, (because naturally I have to take the kids out during the showing) the realtor's office calls to cancel. So it was all for nothing. Try telling that to my "fight or flight" response though....it's still worked up. I hate when this happens to me because it wears me out for the rest of the day. It's exhausting to have my body so worked up and to worry so much. I know that after I finally calm down all that I'll feel like doing is staring at a wall, but I can't do that. I have too many responsibilities today: packing, taking care of my toddle tot, a Geology test and Political Science homework. Aaargh!
I really can't wait until we move out next Wednesday because I really think that will help my anxiety. To me, having strangers in my home pawing through my things is like the worst thing that could happen.
I am nervous about going to belly dancing tomorrow too. Last week I flipped out. To someone who doesn't have anxiety this is going to sound so lame, but here's why: We had to get into a "V" formation. Usually we all stand in our spots and dance there. Well this dance calls for us getting into a "V", changing places in the "V" and then going into a circle. Freaks me the heck out.
One more week of this, and hopefully...life will start to be normal again.
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